Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
my sisters under your porch take her home
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Randomize
