ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize