why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Randomize
