there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
