Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
