no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
