I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Randomize