wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
