Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize
