Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
