tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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