As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Randomize
