My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
