Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
MIDGETS
????
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
