Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
