Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
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