ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Randomize
