The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
Randomize
