i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
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