I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
