i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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