All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
