just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
you win again, gameday.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I love having hate sex.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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