question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
did i just pee glitter
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize
