I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Randomize
