the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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