it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Randomize