And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize
