So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Randomize
