ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
The uberlube is also flammable
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Randomize
