dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
God I need to hump something, right now.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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