Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
I think I sprained my soul last night
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize