I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
He passed out mid-signature
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
