Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize