I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I hate all girls vehemently.
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Randomize
