What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
