Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
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