I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
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