So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
