I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize
