So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
