Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize