Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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