They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Randomize
