i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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