Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
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