How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Randomize
