ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
