The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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