how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Randomize