ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
